Judging Judy: Sex Food for Thought

Let's get one thing straight: Best Sex Writing 2010, edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel and published by Cleis Press, is not a collection of erotica. You can blow out the candles and take the batteries out of your bullet, because this isn't exactly literature you can get off to. Instead, this kind of sex writing is the kind that makes you think.

According to Bussel, Best Sex Writing 2010's theme is that of being a sexual outlaw; it's about unconventional sex and why it's fine to reject the norms. Each of the 25 short essays in this book offers interesting insight. The writing quality is very good throughout the book, allowing the reader to truly appreciate the content offered without stumbling over awkward phrasing or dry passages.

The essays are so varied in style and theme that I am sure any reader will find at least one essay that they really enjoy, that will make them think about the topic discussed long after the essay has been read. The three essays that really stuck with me are "Secrets of the Phallus: Why Is the Penis Shaped Like That?", "BDSM and Playing with Race", and "Toward a Performance Model of Sex".

In "Secrets of the Phallus", Jesse Bering discusses reasons for the shape of the human phallus. It smacks of Rudyard Kipling's "Just So" stories, and I couldn't help but imagine a story entitled "How the Human Penis Got Its Shape". It was entertaining and informational; the next time I see my boyfriend's penis I will appreciate it that much more, knowing how it theoretically came to be.

Mollena Williams's "BDSM and Playing with Race" is a shade darker. In it, Williams recounts her experiences as an African-American woman who engages in race-play. To be honest, I was very uneasy when reading this piece, though by the end of the essay, Williams sufficiently explains and defends her choice. This is the essay that will probably stick in my memory the longest, simply because it is so disturbing.

"Toward a Performance Model of Sex", by Thomas MacAulay Millar is my favorite. My boyfriend, who also read this book, disliked the format so much that he couldn't even finish the essay, which is a pity. I myself gave up on it the first time I tried to read it--it's the only essay in the collection with actual citations, and that was overwhelming in a book full of otherwise "easy" reads. I ended up reading it in its entirety after I had finished the other essays, and was glad that I had given it a second chance. "Toward a Performance Model of Sex" compares two views of sex: the Commodity Model, which Millar claims is the popular Western view, and the Performance Model, which is the view that Millar encourages readers to take. To any and all who chance to pick up Best Sex Writing 2010, if you only have time to read one essay, read this one. It may take a little more time to get used to the format, but it's worth it.

The other essays cover topics such as safe sex practices, the problem with abstinence-only sex-ed, labiaplasty, pubic hair in the past and present, Twilight, sex surrogates... With so many flavors to sample, you're bound to find something exciting. And I don't mean erotica exciting; I mean tingle-in-your-brainpan exciting.

I find myself bringing up Best Sex Writing 2010 in conversation a lot. There's a relevant essay for nearly every sex-related topic I discuss with my friends. As a result of my constant mention of the book and occasional reading from it, there are currently a handful of people on the waiting list to borrow my copy of the book. So grab a copy just for you, or for sharing with your significant other(s) or friends. Or get everyone their own copy. I know I will be reading and re-reading this book for some time to come.

This book and Best Fetish Erotica are featured by the SexIs Book Club this month. Go check 'em out!